Friday, March 16, 2012

5 Minute Friday


The topic: Brave

It's so funny that this is the topic for today. A few years ago "Brave" was my theme. I worked very hard to step out of my comfort zone and do things differently than I had before. Try things. Put myself out there more.

You see, I'd been hurt and betrayed by someone I'd thought was close to me. (She was close, and I allowed her to stay close even though her mental illness influenced her to damage me at the core of who I am. In retrospect I should have done more to protect myself. I know better now.) I believed the lies that were told to me, and I was not the person I had been before those awful weeks of phone calls ending in hang-ups and venomous emails and instant messages.

Thankfully, her mental illness was soon curtailed by pharmaceuticals. My heart, however, was not so easily repaired. It is still scarred in places from the experience. I will always be wary of people wanting to be close to me, a sad by-product of the damage inflicted.

The following year I was faced with the choice: should I be brave, or should I continue to hide the core of who I am and the gifts I've been given?

I chose bravery in small doses.

{end of 5 minutes}

I'm doing better now than I was then. My ear surgery certainly curtailed my bravery in a physical sense, as I am not able to try snowboarding, skiing, snowshoeing, or any other snow-related sports...but I did get out  into the wild and took some nature photos. Yay!

PS: If you want better brave reading, read this from my friend Teri Lynne.

2 comments:

Jacqui said...

Hi I'm visiting a little late from 5 minute Friday. Thanks for sharing your story...even that is brave!

Lori said...

So glad you vfound the courage to be brave. What great theme for a year! Thank you for sharing.