Tuesday, January 08, 2013
My One Word for 2013: Dream
OK, so this is a tough one for me. Because I'm not a dreamer.
Oh sure, when I was a teen, I dreamed of being a backup singer for Kathy Troccoli (I wanted her inimitable sense of style--plus her songs weren't too high), and I dreamed of writing a series of books like Little House on the Prairie or Anne of Green Gables.
Then I learned to make my dreams much, much smaller. Teacher, wife, mom of 2 girls.
Done, done, and done.
Not easily, and not always easily and with a bit of heartache, but . . . accomplished.
What's a reformed dreamer to do when her husband's next career takes her away from some of those accomplished dreams?
Well, she pouts, apparently. And she lets writing rejections and discouraging people get her down. She closes her eyes and heart to the people who are not discouraging, and she stops dreaming.
She heals. And the part of her she thought was dead is alive again, teaching again, healing.
But she's still afraid of rejection--the rejection of "We're sorry" or worse, nothing at all, to the words carved on the screen from her heart.
Enter 2013, themeless and "one word"-less.
Last summer, I went to a jewelry party, and I bought these bracelets for my girls. Somehow, though, I decided I needed one too, so I ordered three. The girls loved their little bracelets with the purple cords, lightweight and pretty.
Then I found mine, hidden in a drawer. And I knew. And I denied it.
But I knew.
I was afraid. Still am. Even now as I write this, knowing I need to share it for the handful of people who read this little blog in the corner of the blogosphere.
I had debated between "dream" and "prayer," because I will be writing a series of very basic, simple, hopefully inspired Bible studies at Wives of Faith on prayer this year. It sounds more lofty and holy to say "My word for 2013 is prayer."
And yet, here I am, with my tiny bracelet and my heart full of words to share, feeling fearful and afraid to dream.
As I read through the Bible this year, I have already started making notes, not only about prayer, but also about dreams. And I am following a writer I'd love to meet one day, as she inspires women to dream.
And I know I have people in my corner.
One of my other friends mentioned yesterday that sometimes words are friends, that they hold hands. I think she's right. Dreams and prayer are friends.
Special thanks to Melanie at Only a Breath for the custom "One Word" graphic. Thank you!!!