God Sized Dream

I attended a "Transitions of the Heart" webinar given today, and the speaker was author and blogger Holley Gerth, cofounder of the (in)Courage blog. What an encouraging time for me to listen to her answer questions about how to find our God-sized dreams, how to confirm them, how God affirms them.

It was, in its own way, an affirmation for ME. Because people who know me in real life as well as in my cyber-life know that I love writing, and that my big huge dream is to have a book published.

I'm not naive. I know this is a nearly impossible task. I read author blogs, and I keep up with publishing news. I know how very difficult, long, and hard the road to publication is. How fraught with conflict, littered with discarded pages and flash drives, marked by rejection.

I know. But God will not let me let go of this dream. This is why I believe it's from Him.

A very long time ago, I wrote a note to author Robin Jones Gunn, telling her I loved her books (it was when the Glenbrooke series was first beginning). She told me that I should pursue my dream of writing, and to get Sally Stuart's market guide and start writing.

Well, Robin, if you ever read this, I'm finally taking you up on that. (What can I say, I'm slow. Plus I had a full teaching career and two babies and several churches and hubby's job transitions all in there too.)

My goal is to get 10 articles out there, submitted to the world of publishing, by the end of the year.

Will God hone and refine my dream? Perhaps. Is it from Him? Well, I have to believe it is. It's been independently confirmed for me by many people, and not just my best friends and family--others who know me primarily by my work, not by my person.

Only time will tell, however, if it will ever come to fruition.

Coming up...

There will be a rash of book promotions here...because I have a few books to pass along this weekend. For some, I had an obligation to review them. Others arrived unsolicited, but I'll post a note about each of them anyway!

In other news: details with our move are truly coming together. I'm so grateful to the Lord for working those things out! It might not be that hard of a move after all!

I have three weeks of class! OY! I did receive a compliment from my instructor, who suggested I revise my nonfiction piece, then submit it for publication. SUBMIT IT!!!!! It is exactly the kind of affirmation I was looking for--I should not give up on this writing of mine. I should keep going.

And I will.

But for now, the teenage girl in the house wants to check her email and facebook. And I need to clean the kitchen and find some dinner.

Have a great week! Next week I'll be participating in the Wives of Faith blog carnival for military spouse appreciation month, so stay tuned!

How green am I?

In anticipation of Earth Day and a blog tour I'm doing for Green Mama, I was thinking of green tips to share with my readers.

A few years ago, my girls and I decided to start using reusable shopping bags at the grocery store. I wonder how many plastic bags we've avoided? Ten per trip, three trips a month, 360 per year?

I just looked at this website, and billions of plastic bags are headed to our landfills each year. That's overwhelming, isn't it?

If my family has saved 1000 bags from landing in the landfills, and you multiply that by a thousand families, certainly a million bags makes a dent?

So my tip for today is this: as much as possible, use reusable bags. Store them in your car. Make it a habit to grab the bag of bags before you go in to the store for your stock-up shopping. It WILL make a difference. Even if you're only slightly green :)

Random on Wednesday

• Flooding predictions and river crests are all that's in the news lately.
• I'm behind on being ahead on schoolwork--which means I'm right along where I should be.
• I have a blog for my class.
• I don't know if I'll keep it beyond the time of my class.
• My prof doesn't know I used to be an English teacher, but I bet she suspects.
• I read some review books out of order, and have a few I haven't finished yet; but I'll get them done.
• Found Art is a wonderful book.
• I'm tired a lot.
• Selling a house you're living in is hard, hard work.
• Especially in the spring, when it's muddy.
• At least there's mud and not all that icky ucky snow!
• Reading and writing, talking, encouraging, loving, arguing, crabbiness and contentment.
• Yep, that's March so far.

So Long Insecurity

I got this book this week and even though I have about six or seven books that I've started and have yet to finish, this one called my name today, so I began.

Girls, we need this. Oh, we so need this word from the Lord. And from Beth, who's been there, done that, and bought the T-shirt.

If you want to follow along on the Living Proof Ministry blog, you can.

Don't miss the simulcast. Click here to find all the locations. I'll be there. Let me know if you will too. Last time it was Get Out of That Pit and I went alone to Fargo, but all my friends and my mom & sister all went locally to them...so it felt like we were all together, even when we were apart.

PS: if you read the comments: I have not moved yet...we'll be moving in June.

Progress, maybe

I realized I have only posted book reviews for awhile, and I'm sorry about that. But everything else sounds whiny. Do you ever feel that way?

• I've been so scattered.
• I've been eBaying my mom's collections of Precious Moments and rubber stamp sets.
• I've been falling behind in the Bible in 90 Days challenge, so much so that I'm about ready to quit...yet the Holy Spirit prods me onward. I read about half a day's assignment each time.
• We're also getting ready for a PCS (move), and because we have to sell our house I've been sorting our belongings and parting with a lot of things. That is hard for me, as I'm emotional about my stuff.
• I've also been reading like a fiend; hence, the book review posts. I overcommitted on book reviewing, as usual. I decided it's not always my fault. I say yes and write them on my calendar; then the publicity team assigns me a date that doesn't always match. Therefore, I've declined a lot of books lately without definite dates, or with dates that clash with my life's commitments.
• I still have a shelf of books requiring reviews that I never wrote. Oh, I posted what was asked of me, but I have yet to read the book to review it.
• I've also been busy with the class I'm taking. It's taken a lot more work than I first imagined.
• Same with Wives of Faith. It's good work, though.
• I spent quite a bit of last weekend on my daughter's applications for summer dance intensives.

Is it any wonder I'm all over the board emotionally? I need a break, but when I get one, and accomplish a lot on my to-do list, the list grows exponentially the other direction, with more items being added on.

The Ultimate Artistic Struggle

Here it is, in a nutshell: Do you wait for inspiration, or do you just get busy?

I came across my friend Victoria's blog again today on Facebook. We became friends because our husbands are lifelong friends, and a more fascinating woman you'd be hard-pressed to find. She is a person I greatly admire because she's fearless in her work, and encouraging of everyone she meets!

Here is a quote from a recent blog entry:

For those of you who are waiting for something MORE before you start the thing you want to work on (MORE research, MORE preparation, MORE thinking or reading about it…) just. get. started.

I can’t stress enough that TIME is of the essence. The time to begin is now. You can’t do the work if you don’t have SOMEthing to work ON — that means marks on the page, strokes on the canvas, words on the page, SOMEthing to edit and revise. One of my favorite authors, David Foster Wallace, once wrote a great essay about how, as a writer, all of his IDEAS for writing were these perfect pink smiling Gerber babies in his head. He could think about a piece of writing and it was ideal, shining, perfect in its abstraction… but when he wrote it down, yikes! It globbed out onto the page like roadkill, all disjointed and mangled, never eloquent or well stated. And then, his written monstrosity would haunt him, not at all the Gerber baby of an idea, but manifested as a horribly deformed creature who dribbles and leers from the shadows…

I adored that description the moment I read it! It summarized EVERYthing I always felt about my writing… but also held a valuable truth: you can’t do the WORK of something, until you have something tangible to work ON.

Write it down, sketch it out, get started… and then let the work begin!

Good stuff!

Thoughts on a Sunday

I'm taking a few moments to blog tonight, before things get crazy around here with football and sorting paperwork and organizing my week.

Last week my husband was TDY (for my civilian readers, TDY stands for Temporary DutY, or a short trip away; in contrast, a deployment is a long trip away). So it was all I could do to work, go to school, finish my poetry projects for creative writing class (which are DONE! Hallelujah!), and even more daunting: sorting my books. Not all of them, just the ones double-stacked on one shelf (not the whole bookshelf, which I share with Chaplain Hubby--just the top shelf!) and hidden in a closet. I think about thirty books have left the house this week!

(I have this love affair with books....)

I'm still reading the Bible, but I'm quite behind in the Bible in 90 Days challenge. I'm not giving up, even though I'm tempted to do so. I will likely finish in 180! But God is an awesome, wonderful God and I've come further than ever before in reading the Bible completely through!

You'll be seeing a lot of book reviews coming up, and I'll still be over at Wives of Faith too. If you're a military wife, stop by and say hello. We have a great team of writers so it's not just me, and we are talking about Love and being God Strong this month.

February already?

Is it really the first of February already? Where did January go?

Well, the same struggles each day: how do I spend my time as wisely as I can, completing as many things as I can? I can't say I'm succeeding, but it's fair to say I've begun to make some changes. Good ones.

In terms of the goals for this year, a bullet list:

• I am about two weeks behind on Bible in 90 Days. I may not make it by the end of March, but by golly, I'm doing better than I ever have in previous attempts at reading the Bible through!
  
  
• I am finding the writing of poetry to be extraordinarily difficult. Bring on the nonfiction unit, quickly!
  
  
• I am absolutely succeeding in writing something every day. Having a writing class helps that, and I have also been journaling in my personal journal nearly daily. Plus emails help too!
  
  
• I am still trying to figure out how to fit in my regular writing and editing gig at Wives of Faith; some days I have it all together, but other days I get those emails that make me think I can't do it and should quit already. Praise God for Sara Horn, one of the most encouraging people ever!
  
  
• I've only read 6 books this month; I shoot for a goal of 10 each month.
  
  
• Facebook is too much fun and I spend too much time there. 'Nuff said.

On the plus side: I was able to contribute to Sara Horn's new book GOD Strong, and I'd encourage you to visit her site to learn more. My portion is only about a page long, but I was thrilled to share about the dead bird. Really.

I wish you all a great week!

Crazy Dance Week

I figured I'd better post something while I still have some free time!

This is Crazy Dance Week at our house. Yes, my daughters have a performance this weekend, which means extra rehearsals in place of classes this week. I jokingly tell people I'm living at the Empire (the theater we use for performances) this week if they need to find me!

What this means for me is that I will not have as much online time. Perhaps this is a good thing. Sometimes I have a hard time pulling away from the computer, because I love to read emails, message boards, do a little research, read blogs, the news, play games on Facebook, etc. Sometimes an hour has gone by and I didn't even know I'd been online for ten minutes.

I'm hoping that the extra time "unplugged" will help me appreciate all I have. I am also hoping I can catch up on my reading: Bible reading (still plugging along, although I'm three OT books behind), review books, and for my class.

The hurrier I go, the behinder I get

I'm behind, behind, behind.

Behind on book reviewing.

Behind on reading.

Behind on Bible in 90 Days.

Le sigh!

But instead of blogging, I'm going to log off and actually DO IT. :)

PS: Something I learned this week: Moses, Aaron, Joshua, and other elders ate a meal in God's presence! Never knew that before.

That's why I love the Bible. Something new every day!

Fresh in 2010

Presenting...
"Fresh Year, Fresh Start" Kristi has asked for us to post our ideas for our spiritual growth.

I have already posted about my spiritual journaling, and my 2010 theme. I've been trying to keep up with the Bible in 90 Days challenge (a little behind, but plan to catch up this weekend). Additionally, I've stepped up my commitment to helping other military wives at Wives of Faith.

That's a lot!

I'm trying not to beat myself up this year for not accomplishing everything, trying to keep my focus on what is important rather than what is not, reading and writing as much as I can, and above all taking good care of my family.

I'm still excited about all that 2010 will bring, and while it's tough to live in the moment when it's below zero with -30* wind chills, I'm still looking for beauty and joy in the world.

Want to see others' Fresh posts? Go here - and be sure to add yours as well.

Bible in 90 Days Day 4

"How are you doing?" the readers ask with bated breath.

She responds, "Well, I'm doing ok, all things considered."

(just a li'l fiction style for fun!)

I will say this: It's not easy breaking old habits and forming new ones. I'm still trying to find my new rhythm!

I have also found that if I fall behind, that's ok; I can catch up later. Right now I have about seven more chapters in Genesis before I'm caught up.

I'm not, as some of my fellow sojourners, taking notes on this reading. Instead, to avoid bogging myself down, I'm just reading my Bible like a wonderful, familiar-yet-new Book.

It is quite different, reading the Bible more quickly this way, watching His story unfold.

Bible in 90 Days Commitment Post

What I Did Today

Just me, my new 2010 journal, the February Writers Digest on Creativity, and a Caribou campfire mocha at the dance studio.

Happy New Year!

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

Matthew 11:28-30 (The Message)

Focus

I was first intrigued by the idea of an "annual theme" by some of my friends, who seek God's leading and guidance each year through a singular idea. More often than not, the theme is not chosen by the woman herself, but by God. The methods through which He chooses to reveal said theme are as varied as the women themselves, as one might imagine the Creator of the Universe to be creative Himself. It's exciting, not only at the precipice of a new year to see what the theme is, but fascinating to see how God works through that theme in each woman's life.

Last year was the first crystal-clear leading of a theme I felt from the Lord. That theme was Brave. It was a good, although sometimes difficult, year. I'm still learning about stepping out of my comfort zone and how to work around and through my weaknesses, trying to turn them into strengths. Having "Brave" as my theme helped me overcome a few fears and step out of my comfort zone more times than I would have liked, and with good results. It forced me to trust outside myself, and let God have control more than I might have otherwise.

After paging through my last two journals a few weeks ago, I began thinking about 2010 and what God might have in store for me. At first I thought, "I'm not going to pursue a theme this year. 2010 will bring many, many changes in our lives and I just don't want to deal with a theme too!"

Do you think God's going to let me off the hook? Of course not!

Since the day I paged through those journals, I saw over and over again my prayer for FOCUS. Thus, my theme. Here is what focus says to me:

• sharpening or narrowing
• intentional
• more control
• less craziness

One of the things I'm going to do to sharpen my focus is participate in the Bible in 90 Days challenge. I may not make it, but I'm going to give it a try! Spending more of my time in the Word will help my focus stay in the right place.

With many, many changes ahead, I hesitate to post more goals that I won't meet (like the reading challenges of 2009 that I didn't finish!). Most of my personal goals are broad in scope, and many of my household goals will be short-term, to be completed in the next four to five months.

So, here we go!

Happy New Year 2010!

Bible in 90 Days

90 days.
66 books.
2 Testaments.
1 life-changing experience.

Won't you join in?

Amy at Mom's Toolbox

Bible in 90 Days Blog

If you would like a schedule to go by to read the Bible in 90 days, try this one.